Good news is, I actually ended up really liking this lady and will definitely keep going to her, though I'm not entirely sure she'll have me, because I more or less ruined her day.
I haven't had a primary care doctor since Dr. Randolph was giving me scratch and sniff stickers and thanking me for being a brave, and yes that lasted a little past the normal pediatric stage. Turns out, when you go to a new doctor you're required to have blood work done. (Shut up if you knew that.) Guess who didn't eat breakfast? Guess who also passes out pretty easily? Half way through the second vile of blood I knew I was a goner. I woke up with the doctor holding my face asking me if I was alright.
"Are you okay?!"
"I think so."
"Do you know where you are?"
"Ummm, it's my first time here, so I don't remember the name."
"That's a pretty long sentence for just passing out. Cancel the ambulance!"
Excuse me, I like to make things a production.
So after I was a little more stable, they moved me to a different room and give me some V8 Juice, and kept trying to give me crackers. I really wasn't in the mood for crackers, so, no thanks. Ten minutes later, a nurse popped in with some cookies. I knew I was holding out for something better. So, what turned into a thirty minute check up was a roughly hour and forty five minute long ordeal with snack time. Don't worry though, I got the goods.
This cool cat stole my eye patch though.
Here's to waking up a new person.