Wednesday, January 22, 2014

Listen Up!

Hello there.  So, I may or may not have accidentally gotten an Amazon credit card the other day.  Yes, mom, that makes credit card number six.  MIND YOUR BUSINESS!  I know that sounds like a lot of credit cards, but, in my defense, only two of them have actual balances on them, so it's fine.  Anyways, I got it because I got $10 off an order for signing up for one, and guinea pig cages are a lot cheaper on Amazon than in the pet store.  Why do I need a guinea pig cage, you ask?  Well, for a guinea pig, of course.  Why am I getting a guinea pig?  Because the boyfriend won't let me have a chicken.
So, after telling the boyfriend I was going to get one, telling him what I ordered online, telling him that I found a guinea pig that I liked, texting him picture of said guinea pig, AND telling him that all of my guinea pig goodies have been shipped, he asks me two days later if I said something about getting a guinea pig the other day. 

Why?? Why can't you listen to me?!  Listen, I know I talk.  A LOT.  Like, ten times more than your average 15 year old girl does.  I can't help it.  I have a lot to say and an incessant need to say all of it, all the time.  But honey, if you don't start paying attention to me when I talk, you're going to miss important conversations about additions to the family. 

In the boyfriend's defense, I have been told that I absolutely cannot ever have a fourth pet.  Well I can, but not without quickly having to change my relationship status to 'single' after acquiring the fourth addition to that snuggle party up there.  So, maybe I don't really listen either....but that's not the point.  I was two business days away from becoming a mother of four until he came home for lunch the other day and started crushing dreams.  Apparently Olive decided to jump on his head that morning which reminded him how much I wasn't supposed to get her in the first place, which led to him remembering me talking about getting another pet. 
All my fault, guys.
When exactly is it 'too many pets'?  Because I apparently still have plenty of room in my heart for more, and he will only have enough room in his if he kicks me out of it.  Sigh.  At least he knows I love him.  I don't give up on having more furry babies for just anybody.

But David, just so you know, you're in charge of telling the kids we will remain a three pet household, because they actually listen to/can't run away from a conversation with me, and were really excited about 'Fiona'.  How do I know?  Because I LISTENED TO THEM.

Update:  After attempting to sleep/eat/shower/clean my house/lead a normal life today, turns out, the number of pets in this house should never ever exceed three.  Also, I might need a nanny.

The boyfriend never reads this, so please don't tell him he was right.


Also, please refer to this story whenever you want to know who wears the pants in our relationship.  I wash all the pants if that gives you a clue.

Maybe I'll buy some new pants with the money I get back when I send back my sad, empty guinea pig home.

Boyfriends who think rationally about the human to animal ratio in a home are stupid.

1 comment:

  1. haha my boyfriend never listens to me either. Literally the next day he asks me things that I talked about the day before for 10 minutes. So annoying.

    I can't wait to get another dog but we are waiting because I am worried about renting and having more than one pet.